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When something is missing, stillness speaks


Hi there beautiful,

I am feeling sentimental this week as though something is missing in my new home. It’s mercury retrograde so of course this would be coming up now versus last week or last month. 

I did a search on Google to see if anyone else ‘felt like something was missing’ and the search gave me 99,300,000 hits.

Screen Shot 2014-10-17 at 3.17.15 PM

Something’s missing

I feel off in my new place. As thou something is missing. Like a child with a brand new blanky, it’s not ‘lived in’ enough. there hasn’t been enough of those late nights watching funny movies leaving the window open to feel the cool air of a night in Provence, there hasn’t been enough diners over at the house or laughter to soak the happiness into the walls.

It’s not lived in enough.

I read a book to my child the other night: a rabbit had lost his doudou/ blanky and he found a witch to make him a new one. Although he wasn’t happy with the brand new result. It needed the smell his old blanky. The softness of having been played with for hours and days and rarely washed. The smell of the blanky only known to the child who keeps it close to his face day and night. That is what’s missing in my new place. Like a comfortable doudou, it’s missing the familiarity, the songs, the diners, the games, the plants and the life of a home.

It’s there physically, but there’s nothing inside.

It’s honestly how I have been feeling lately. I am here physically in France but my heart isn’t yet here. I don’t know how I am going to fill my home or get my heart back here. For now observation is enough to help me set an intention of filling up what’s missing.

Getting to stillness.

I can intend on getting to know the place, feeling what it might need from me to add to it and what I may want to receive from it. Entering into a sacred exchange with a sacred space. Respecting its needs and its energies. Listening to it with care. Writing positive words on the walls. Emanating love from my heart to its walls. Knowing the time and energy I invest in it, means it’s there for me when I need a boost energetically. As an introvert and highly sensitive soul (multi clair intuition will do that) – I need a haven to come home to that can fill me up. My last home had been lived in for 10 years. Loved up is the more correct. I painted the walls, I meditated for hours and I invited high energy beings to come into it. I had the incredible privilege of having Doreen Virtue place a transmuter over the roof of my home in Las Vegas. (A transmuter is a device she created with Archangel Michael to shield and protect continually).

That home was the healing dove headquarter. It was lived in and loved up.

Will I shift the energy from there back here? I will. I am. It’s still taking me time to heal, process and accept my life and mission is now here. I have already made so many great friends who are incredibly loving in every way and I can only keep putting one foot in front of the other using the same faith that took care of me all those sweet years teaching spiritual practices in Las Vegas.

So that’s your peak into the life of an adult indigo going through a mercury retrograde. Feeling sentimental, as though it’s not time to move forward but more like time to process all that’s happened this year and to take it slow with any new projects or relationships.

What’s my plan?

You know I think I will do what worked for me in the past. Just as I am more interested and passionate about what’s inside then outside, I will use the same principles of going within and from there, the rest will take care of itself. If I am present and paying attention to the now, the home will naturally raise its frequency to that of a real comfortable doudou I love coming home to every night. If I attempt to ignore what I am feeling, what it’s resonating back to me, we won’t get anywhere or be much of anything for each other. Just as children let their doudous inside their heart, and the crease of their precious hands, so can I let everything about my home get close to me and I close to it. With enough  presence, meditation and positive intentions something good always turns up.


breakfast in bed

I ran into this image after publishing this article – within 60 seconds – LOL. Another idea for filling up what’s missing is obviously to fall in love and let that energy fill up my home.

Turns out, that’s also in the works, but more on that later!  😉

PS: The same week-end of writing this article, my aunt came over with a car full of goodies for my home, paintings, rugs, and memories. We had friends over for diner almost every night, walls abound with laughter, songs and sparkles.

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